I keep seeing articles and posts about how people should cope with the new state of the world, will all kinds of various suggestions about how to “defend” oneself from harm. They’ve gotten me thinking, mostly about the stuff they don’t suggest. And now I really regret telling people that social isolation is nothing to be ashamed of. In the old world, keeping to yourself was a pretty good way to stay safe and sane. These days I’m not sure that’s the case. I think that if you want to protect yourself you’ve got to be a little famous.
Not Beyoncé famous necessarily (though if you can do that, you maybe should), but just a little bit famous. What you really need is to be well-known enough that a lot of people will be ready to pitch a fit if you disappear. That means at least having a Twitter following or something, one that you frequently engage with, so that people will start asking questions if you go quiet for a day or two.
Yeah sure, you have friends. You have family. You have coworkers. But they probably aren’t numerous or powerful enough to effect your release. They can go to the media, but the media won’t care. You have to either be in the media, or you have to be fairly notable. I mean if (when) Jake Tapp*r or Neil deGrasse Tyson gets goes missing, you know they’re going to cover that shit on the news. That might not help them much, but it’s something.
I guess what I’m saying is that you should start posting funny cat videos or something, I don’t know. Try to be really good looking and talented, that’ll help.